How to Survive Joint Custody

Joint custody is a popular choice for parents who are never married or parents who get a divorce. It is a great opportunity for children because it allows them to have both of their parents in their life. The problem with joint custody is that it takes a lot of work. You and your children’s other parent have to be willing to work together in order for joint custody to be successful. Fortunately, there are things you can do and steps you can take to make your joint custody a success.

Bite Your Tongue Before Opening Your Mouth

Thinking before you speak is a concept that really needs to be practiced in a joint custody situation. Regardless of how you feel about your child’s other parent, these are feelings you need to keep to yourself. Your child loves his or her other parent. Talking badly about your former spouse in front of your child can lead to big problems later on. Your children need to understand that both of their parents love them no matter what.

Cut Your Ex Some Slack

Just because your ex was not very good at being a spouse, this does not mean they are not very good at being a parent. In fact, they could be a much better parent than a spouse. It is important to take a step back and make sure any anger or aggressive towards their parenting skills or methods is appropriate. You gave them a chance to be your spouse, now you need to give them a chance to be a parent.

Always Be Realistic

When you are fighting for joint custody for your child, you need to really stop and think about what you are asking for. The time you have your child is time you should be spending with your child. It does not make a lot of sense for you to fight for time with your child while you are not home because of your job or school. It is important to make sure you are not acting out of fear or trying to get more time with your child just to punish your spouse.

If you and your ex are on really bad terms, you need to find a way to communicate effectively. This can include texting, emailing, or even using a sharable calendar online. The worst thing you can do is argue with your ex in front of your child because you are on bad terms.


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