Wow! That’s a pretty big order isn’t it? There are probably a million things on the internet that address the question “How to make your wife happy?” not to mention “How to save your marriage?” Isn’t it sad that so many people type this into a Google search each day?
First of all, I am not a counselor, or pastor, nor have I written a book. But I have a husband, and a grown son, and sons-in-law; and I have common sense. I see what is going on in my family, and my friend’s families, and I observe and analyze the problems common to so many of us in our marriages. Problems abound in marriages, but I am going to venture to say this one thing. And, if men would remember just this one thing, a lot of problems would go away.
Here we go guys! This is one of the main things you need to remember to make your wife, or significant other, happy. It’s not about the money! In a nutshell, that means that the expensive gifts you buy (however wonderful they may be); don’t really add up to a lot, to a woman, if that’s all you do. Likewise, the big salary you make (however unfair you may think this is), doesn’t add up to much, if that’s all you do.
Let me explain. Somehow, I lucked up with my husband. He gets it. I get nice things occasionally, but what’s important to me, and to every other woman I know, are the small things. Hear that guys? It’s the small things that count! To a woman, the small, thoughtful things you do add up just as quickly and importantly as the big things. I might get a flower picked out of our yard, or a left over cookie from his lunch, or a wind chime, for no other reason than he knows I like them.
I know most men don’t understand this kind of thinking. Shouldn’t a dozen roses count for more than a flower from my yard? Remember, guys! It isn’t about the money. Women are wired to want constant reminders of your love. A small reminder every day means just as much, or more, than one big reminder once every few months, or only on special occasions. If the date on a calendar dictates that you do something for your wife (Valentine’s, maybe), and that’s the only time you do anything . . . . .sorry, you have blown it!
Yes, we appreciate that you work hard, and bring home that big paycheck. But spending extra time at work to make it bigger, and spending less time at home helping with the kids, or just hanging out . . .that does not feel like love to a woman. If you have to work extra hours just to pay the rent, and put food on the table, of course that’s a necessity. But if you think that just making more is what your wife wants from you and your marriage, please think again. She wants you, your companionship, your help, and some of your undivided attention. Just the little things.
As I write this, I am absolutely certain, that this way of thinking won’t make sense to a lot of men. But guys, as hard as it may be to understand, just take my word for it . . . . . men and women don’t think alike! For every man who thinks this is crazy talk, I guarantee you, there are just as many women who are reading, and nodding their heads in agreement. Go ask your wife. Say “I just read this crazy article. What do you think?” Be prepared, she’s going to agree with me!
And please understand guys. I don’t think for a minute that most of you are purposely being thoughtless or unloving. I know this sounds illogical to most of you. But trust me; it is what it is. This is how women think. Give it a try, please.
Honestly do just a few of these small things, or come up with your own, and your marriage will improve:
·Give her compliments
·Bring home small, thoughtful gifts for no reason
·Pick up after yourself, offer to help
·Turn off the TV, and Listen to her
·Hold her hand in public
·Ask questions about her day, and Listen
·Take the kids to the playground, and give her some down time
·Put a sweet note on the mirror or fridge for her
I know I said there was one thing to remember, and this list looks like a lot. But none of the things on the above list require much money. These involve being thoughtful and showing love in small but very significant ways. Guys, these things, and other similar actions are what a woman needs to feel loved. If it’s against your nature, practice! You are reading this because you want to improve your marriage. I am telling you how. It’s not about the money!
I am a retired High School Media Specialist. I am married, have three grown children, and five grandchildren. This grandbaby thing is wonderful, and takes a lot of my time. I spend my time substitute teaching, reading, working for a paid forum posting company, ebay selling, and internet hopping. I have tried several home ventures since I retired, but the one that was the most fun was a homemade dog treat business. I am constantly looking for ways to pick up a little extra income online, and really enjoy writing.